If you put a frog into a pot filled with water and start heating the water. As the temperature of the water begins to rise, the frog adjusts its body temperature accordingly. The frog keeps adjusting its body temperature with the increasing temperature of the water. Just when the water is about to reach boiling point, the frog cannot adjust anymore. At this point, the frog decides to jump out. The frog tries to jump but it is unable to do so because it has lost all its strength in adjusting with the rising water temperature. Very soon the frog dies.
What killed the frog?
I know many of us will say the boiling water. But the truth about what killed the frog was its own inability to decide when to jump out.
We all need to adjust to people & situations, but we need to be sure when we need to adjust & when we need to move on. There are times when we need to face the situation and take appropriate actions. If we allow people to exploit us physically, emotionally, financially, spiritually or mentally they will continue to do so.
What is it that leads to this fervent need to constantly live up to the values of others? Is it the desperate need to fit in? The lack of Self-Esteem? or Perhaps it’s peer pressure? Adjusting your own values to please someone else leaves you living a fake persona and you lose sight of who you really are your individual needs and the things you truly care about.
The story of the frog makes is clear that it takes more energy to adjust than it does to jump or leave a situation that’s forcing you to adjust to someone else’s needs. It is something most people do unintentionally but for the most part, it is intentional, whether it’s in their professional space, social grouping or in a relationship people want to fit in. They want to please the people they share their bubble or pot with, so much so that they adjust themselves accordingly even when the temperature of those relationships rise to a point of discomfort.
Remember, even if everyone else is comfortable in that boiling water, you are the only one who can decide when to jump and you have to do it while you still have the strength to.
©Etta D. Richards