Nobody sees anybody truly but all through the flaws of their own egos. That is the way we all see …each other in life. Vanity, fear, desire, competition– all such distortions within our own egos– condition our vision of those in relation to us. Add to those distortions to our own egos the corresponding distortions in the egos of others, and you see how cloudy the glass must become through which we look at each other. That’s how it is in all living relationships except when there is that rare case of two people who love intensely enough to burn through all those layers of opacity and see each other’s naked hearts.”
This time of year is always reflective for me. As we go into the holidays and prepare for the coming New Year it’s difficult not to reflect on the year or years past. If you’ve followed my blog for a while or dug into my archives you would have a clear indication of some of my struggles, my challenges and my triumphs. Four years ago I was in a different place than I am now, 2014 was a great year; 2015 was a sad and worrying one. The following year there was a glimmer of hope which was short-lived, for the most part, I spent the year trying to rebuild my life by diving in full force into the job hunt which wasn’t at all what I thought it would be as I hit one dead end after another. Looking back now, it was more discouraging than it was depressing. The worse part was when I did finally land a job it was in a toxic environment, something I wasn’t used to. The university was a beautiful place to work and each day I looked forward to going there, however, the office I landed in was a toxic environment.
The bright side though there were a few people that really made it bearable because they were genuine in their attitudes and I am so grateful to them. In the past, throughout my career, whenever things didn’t go well on the job, I’ve always looked for the fault in myself, maybe I was expecting too much from those around me. Or, maybe I was being too sensitive about other peoples attitudes towards me. In the past few years, I’ve grown into my own, I’ve come to the realisation that it doesn’t matter who or where you are, there will always be a clash of personalities.
Life is full of emotions, attitudes and beliefs. The thing I had to understand and accept about beliefs is that everyone believes that what he or she believes is the truth. It’s their entitlement, people can believe in whatever they want as long as they don’t force their beliefs on others. Through those beliefs, you can get a true understanding of who those people. The attitudes show that every ego has its needs. Remember sometimes those needs come at the expenses of others.
This is my submission to Debbie’s Forgiving Friday series, where she writes about and invite others to share their thoughts on Forgiveness, Self-Love and Personal Growth.
@Etta D. Richards