“If you walked away from a toxic, negative, abusive, one-sided, dead-end low vibrational relationship or friendship— you won.”
~Lalah Delia

It’s easy to forget that the way people treat you, what people say or do, say more about them than it says about you. You can walk away from the drama but sometimes drama runs into you head-on. One of the best aspects of working from home for me is being away from all the drama of the office and not having to wade through all the different personalities.  However, despite working from home though, there is still that interaction between colleagues and yes, sometimes hairs do get crossed, this is when the drama find you!   I faced a situation this week that made me step out of character. Looking back at it now, I’m not proud of myself for wasting my energy on such an insignificant thing of someone trying to pass the blame because I knew better.  I saw it coming but instead of protecting myself by walking away, I went into it head-on, guns blazing.

It’s human nature to lash out when facing a toxic situation you have to remind yourself of that opening clause, ‘how people treat you, what people say or do says more about them than it says about you.’ This may mean very little coming from me, the me who stepped out of character but don’t take things people say or do too personal.  We are all going through some emotional crisis, some people are better than handling it than others, some handle their frustration through defiance, thoughtlessness or just being rude. Whichever way they choose, it’s their best way of dealing with whatever situation they’re facing at that time. It may be difficult to interpret their behaviour but you can control how you respond to their behaviour. 

I had to also acknowledge my part in the situation, which isn’t always easy for many people as they will never accept their responsibility of adding fuel to a fire. In hindsight, I reflected on my own wisdom by reaffirming to myself that I’m good enough at what I do and don’t need the validation of others, I’m smart enough to recognize that some fights are better left alone and I’m strong enough to not allow the opinions of others define who I am as a person. Wisdom also affirms that my self-esteem, my self-confidence, my self-worth are my responsibility, not those around me and that my emotions should not be dominated by others. 

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©Etta  D. Richards

5 thoughts on “Protecting Yourself by Walking Away From Drama

  1. Fights, drama = no fun! Like you said, sometimes you can see it coming and engage anyway!

    We have a situation in our family where one person has a mental illness and when she gets off her meds she ends up unloading and blaming another family member for EVERYTHING! It’s exhausting. We just experienced a new round of that, and now it’s gotten worse because she has convinced another person, young and impressionable, that she is 100% right. It’s creating high drama.

    My part? To keep reminding the person who is being unloaded on just to keep everything factual, not to jump into the name calling etc. I remind her this only happens when person A is off her meds. It’s useless to argue with person A, just like it’s useless to argue with a drunk!

    Is it difficult to not take what’s going on personally when it’s a viscous attack? Absolutely. I need to keep reminding person B who she IS, and she certainly isn’t all that person A is making her out to be.

    Complicated? Yes. We can’t change person As mind. We can’t fix her or make her take her meds. Person B, and all who support her, can only take a mental step back and do their best not to get upset, have their blood pressure sky rocket and try to maintain their peace of mind, in spite of the angry and very damaging words coming from person A.

    Difficult to do? Yes. Very. We need to pick and choose our fights. Sometimes we win even when it looks like we might lose, for keeping our peace is priceless. Not to mention that screenshots are taken of the whole conversation which clearly shows that person A was on the warpath looking to pick a fight through any means, and person B didn’t give her the satisfaction!

    Like

    1. Wow!! That’s a lot to take in and a lot of drama. It’s kinda like my family I have an uncle with mental health issues, so I can identify with what you’re saying about being off meds, he’s the same when he’s off his. Thanks for sharing, the battles must be so hard for you and your family x ❤ x ❤ x ❤

      Liked by 1 person

      1. They’re certainly a challenge! I guess your post struck a note within me! Even with these difficult challenges we can still pick and choose our fights, right?!

        Liked by 1 person

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