There have been so many times in my life that I wished I could just hit that reset button. Those times stuck in traffic and forgot to take that short cut, late for a flight and having to pay that penalty, missed on on the big one and didn’t make that investment. Here I am again, finding myself looking for that reset button, only this time it’s not about being late for a flight, we’re in lockdown, I have nowhere to go? Or about missing that big investment or being stuck in traffic. This time is beyond my control, this time, it’s a test of love, hope, but most of all a test of faith. Is my love great enough to pass on the healing energy to another Being who has lived in my heart for the past 11 years? Do I have enough hope to carry them through this unfortunate ordeal and is my faith strong enough to be rewarded with a much-needed miracle? These are the questions that have been playing in my head for the past two weeks.
“Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” Hebrews 11:1 There is a thin line between holding the faith and letting go. We all go through seasons in our lives where our faith is rocked to the core and we just want to let go. But life is about learning to take leaps of faith, putting one foot in front of another even if you can’t see the path in front of you. Life is about believing in what some may call the impossible, it’s about living beyond the boundaries of what our mind tells us is the limit. I stand at the threshold of that line, my faith is being tested and I wished to God there was a reset button right now. Throughout our journey, there have been struggles, we climbed mountains even when we couldn’t see the top. Through those struggles, we’ve learned to laugh, cry, and to accept things even when they weren’t going our way. It has to led us to a greater appreciation of the good times. it gave us insight into how our life should be and how we wanted it to be and it has been a wonderful life, is it selfish to want more of those years together?
Right now I’m trying to remind myself that on cloudy days, even when we can’t see it, the Sun is there. Faith is no different, even in times we question it, faith is there, hope is there, love is every present and even in our darkest hours, the Universe is conspiring to give us that which we seek and like all things in life through the next God is omniscient and miracles happen everyday! This day and everyday until we get a clear diagnoses, I’m keeping the faith, while praying for a miracle!
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©Etta D. Richards